I just wish...

I just wish she would grow up. It is July 14th, and she is out at the club again. It is ladies night there. She first tried to tell me that there wouldn't be guys there, but I am not dumb. I know that ladies get in free on ladies night. Guys can still get in. I hate how she dresses. She dresses like a lost little teenage girl. She had a mini-skirt/blouse/dress, or whatever it is called. Too "mini" for my taste. At least too "mini" for other people to see her. I hate knowing what she is doing, where she is going, what she is wearing, etc. I hate it, but she was/is my wife. How come she is the one leaving, and the one who gave up everything to try and make his family happy, and safe, and everything is the only one feeling the hurt. She has NO idea what this is like. She is the one doing the leaving, NOT me. Imagine if she actually loved me. She said she did, but after hearing her say that she NEVER thought we should be together, I don't really believe it. Imagine if she was in so much love with me, and then one day I tell her that I am going to leave. She asks "why?", and i would say, because i care more about myself. I love my baby girl, but sometimes, i just hate being the mature one because the mature and responsible one is always the one who gets hurt.